“Waaahhh...”
Via The Lincoln Project, who would’ve ever guessed that the strongest, smartest, bravest, most patriotic American president in the history of our country (with the most perfect memory, no less) would turn out to be such a… Well, wait for the punchline:
-
Poor baby.
Cheers and Jeers for Thursday, April 25, 2024
Note: There’s an old saying that goes, “There’s an old saying that goes.” I’ve always found comfort in that, especially in these troubled times. I hope you do, too.
-
By the Numbers:
Days 'til start of the Summer Olympics in Paris: 92
Days 'til the National Pie Championships in Orlando: 4
Percent increase in new home sales during March, 2024 versus March, 2023: 8.3%
Increase in electric vehicles sold in European Union countries during the first quarter of the year: 4%
Typical decibel level of, respectively, human conversation, a motorcycle engine, and a gas-powered leaf blower: 50 / 95 / 100
Amount Melania Trump is charging for a cheap "Mom's Day" necklace: $245
Age of Steve Martin's hit King Tut as of this week: 46
-
Your Thursday Molly Ivins Moment:
In the United States, we do not have full-throated, full-throttle debate about Israel. In Israel, they have it as a matter of course, but the truth is that the accusation of anti-Semitism is far too often raised in this country against anyone who criticizes the government of Israel.
Being pro-Israel is no defense, as I long ago learned to my cost. Now I've gotten used to it. Jews who criticize Israel are charmingly labeled "self-hating Jews." As I have often pointed out, that must mean there are a lot of self-hating Israelis, because those folks raise hell over their own government's policies all the time.
I don't know that I've ever felt intimidated by the knee-jerk "you're anti-Semitic" charge leveled at anyone who criticizes Israel, but I do know I have certainly heard it often enough to become tired of it.
And I wonder if that doesn't produce the same result: giving up on the discussion.
—April, 2006
-
Puppy Pic of the Day: Hello, kiddo…
-
CHEERS to our top story of the day. George Santos says he's not running for Congress anymore. Apparently his schedule is too jam-packed now with polishing all his Nobel and Pulitzer Prizes, traveling to accept citations of genius from leaders around the globe, supervising the Mars expedition, tending to his brain-surgery patients, and becoming a full-time pope. In other words: he knows he's going to prison.
CHEERS to protecting the innocent. Hey, red states! Maine has a little present for you this morning: a giant middle finger to all the right-wing Jesus freaks and "states' rights for me but not for thee" hypocrites in your legislatures who to go after anyone seeking or providing abortion services in states that allow them:
Maine’s Democratic governor has signed a bill designed to protect providers of abortion and gender-affirming care from legal action brought by other states.
Gov. Janet Mills signed the proposal after the Democratic-controlled Maine Legislature approved it earlier in the month. The state joins more than a dozen others that protect medical providers from out-of-state investigations about abortions.
Representatives for Planned Parenthood Maine Action Fund said Tuesday the signing of the bill was a major step for reproductive freedom in Maine.
"Thank God I'll have somewhere to take my pregnant mistress to get rid of my handiwork from her tummy," said red state legislators and preachers...very, very quietly to themselves.
CHEERS to genome sweet genome. On April 25, 1953, scientists identified DNA for the first time. Its appearance is described by the U.S. National Library of Medicine as "two long strands that form a spiral called a double helix." Or, as many wrongly-convicted prisoners have come to describe it: two long strands that form a lifeline.
CHEERS to pigskin fever! Round 1 of the NFL draft is today. Moments after he hears the word "draft," Ted Nugent will instinctively respond by shitting his pants.
-
BRIEF SANITY BREAK
-
-
END BRIEF SANITY BREAK
-
CHEERS to the generosity of the "net"-roots. Today is April 25th—World Malaria Day. The World Health Organization's theme this year is “Accelerating the Fight for a More Equitable World." While progress has been made testing and treating children, it's still not enough to make the kind of dent one would hope humanity would've made against the mosquito-borne disease by now:
In recent years, progress in reducing malaria has ground to a standstill. Not only does malaria continue to directly endanger health and cost lives, but it also perpetuates a vicious cycle of inequity. People living in the most vulnerable situations including pregnant women, infants, children under 5 years of age, refugees, migrants, internally displaced people, and Indigenous Peoples continue to be disproportionately impacted.
The WHO African Region shoulders the heaviest burden of the disease—accounting, in 2022, for 94% and 95% of malaria case and deaths. Rural populations in the African region living in situations of poverty and with less access to education are the most impacted.
On World Malaria Day 2024, WHO joins the RBM Partnership to End Malaria and other partners in highlighting barriers to health equity, gender equality and human rights in malaria responses worldwide—as well as concrete measures to overcome them.
If you feel inclined, you can help fund mosquito nets and other life-saving measures being distributed by United to Beat Malaria. As Kossack Denise Oliver Velez is fond of saying: "Got ten dollars? Save a child's life. It's that simple." If only everything was.
CHEERS to moral depravity. 24 years ago this week, while he was still Vermont's governor, Howard Dean signed the first civil unions bill in the nation:
“This is a statement that Vermont values people for who they are, not what they are,” the Democrat said after signing the first-in-the-nation law extending virtually all the benefits of marriage to gay and lesbian couples.
Under the law, same-sex couples will be able to enter into a civil union intended to be the parallel of marriage. They will be able to go to any town clerk for a license that may then be certified by a justice of the peace or a clergy member. A dissolution will be handled in family court, just as divorces are. [I]t is expected to have a profound effect on many laws in this state, including adoption, inheritance and health care.
Today Vermont and all the other states are required to extend full marriage rights to same-sex couples, thanks (astonishingly) to the Supreme Court. And does God approve of all this? Well, we did have a plague…but no swarms of locusts yet. We'll mark Him down as neutral.
-
Ten years ago in C&J: April 25, 2014
CHEERS to a deluxe field trip for one. President Obama continues his Asia trip into the weekend, drawing cheering crowds and generating lots of positive press on behalf of the United States. Some highlights for the remainder of his trip:
Saturday: Meets with business leaders to discuss Asia trade pact…Combined Forces Command Briefing at Yongsan Garrison…travels to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia…attends a State Dinner at Istana Negara.
Sunday: Greets members of the U.S. Embassy in Malaysia…visits the National Mosque of Malaysia…meets with Prime Minister Najib Razak at Perdana Putra…speaks at the Malaysian Global Innovation and Creativity Center…participates in the Young Southeast Asian Leaders Initiative Town Hall at the University of Malaysia.
As usual, the right-wingers will engage in their usual freak-out if the president's body shifts even one degree forward ("He's bowing to a ferriner! He hates America!") or backward ("He's letting ferriners push him around! He hates America!"). Don't stray too far, Biden—anything beyond five degrees and impeachment's on the table.
-
And just one more…
CHEERS to the apple of CBS's eye. Happy 116th birthday today to CBS News legend Edward R. “Good Night, and Good Luck” Murrow. He had more journalistic integrity in his pinky than many of today's journalistic misfits (too many of whom call CBS News home) have on their entire resumes. He was a fighter for journalistic independence free of the entertainment side of television, and his clipped and unemotional delivery only added to his gravitas. From his New York Times obituary:
One former staff member recalled the instruction Mr. Murrow gave to his newsmen.
The reporter must never sound excited even if bombs are falling outside, Mr. Morrow said.
Rather, the reporter should imagine that he has just returned to his hometown and that the local editor has asked him to dinner with, for example, a banker and a professor.
"After dinner," Mr. Murrow counseled, "your host asks you 'Well, what was it like?' As you talk, the maid is passing the coffee and her boyfriend, a truck driver, is waiting for her in the kitchen and listening. You are supposed to describe things in terms that make sense to the truck driver without insulting the intelligence of the professor."
Unfortunately chain-smoking (up to three packs a day) snuffed out his life prematurely at 57—lung cancer. Hear excerpts of his W.W. II and McCarthy hearing reports here. And, hey, don’t smoke.
Have a nice Thursday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
-
Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial
"Cheers and Jeers kiddie pool juice contains water and electrolytes, such as sodium and potassium, which can help replenish fluids and electrolytes lost through sweating during exercise or hot weather."
—Abbey Sharpe, Dietician
-